Radio GaGa

Well. It’s been a couple of days, huh?

I started blogging in 2003 to stay awake. I was an overnight radio traffic reporter on a 24-hour all-news station, and there were long gaps between my reports. Long gaps sitting in a dark room with nothing to do at 3am was not conducive to staying awake so I started blogging over at Diaryland. I would write and write and write and write until my shift was over, and when my shift was over my entry was over and I’d post it. Nobody but me was reading it back then, so I didn’t give a shit about form or grammar or anything else. It was just a tool to keep me from sending snoring sounds over the air instead of traffic reports.

In 2003 me and NewWifey(tm) celebrated our 2nd wedding anniversary, we were both constantly either riding our motorcycles or each other, and we had a Pembroke Welsh Corgi who chased after bears and a cute little orange cat that I once fucked with a Q-Tip (it’s in the archives). Life was good.

A few years later our company was taken over by a large network and not only did my hours change to something less vampire-ish, but my workload was increased. My diary entries started to become more sporadic. I didn’t need the stimulation of writing to keep my eyes open, and I didn’t have time any more even if I did. I started writing more at home, in what free moments I could find.

Then our network was taken over by another network. They changed my hours again, and my job. I was no longer a traffic reporter. I was now a news anchor. While on the face of it a step up, in reality the new position required much more work. I had to take print stories filed by our reporters and craft them into a format suitable for radio, which often meant complete re-writes as well as producing and inserting audio cuts. So…less time for blogging.

Then COVID. Work from home, work for workers out with COVID, work for workers who died from COVID, work work work. My schedule got so busy I was having to do show prep every night before bed or I wouldn’t have enough time in the morning to write all the stories I needed for my newscasts. Any downtime I had generally saw me sitting glaze-eyed in front of the TV playing “Red Dead Online” until I had to get back to work.

Less blogging.

In between, the corgi and kitty died, as did the next kitty. My hot sports car got replaced by an SUV (ah, married life). I had surgery on both elbows and had to give up boxing but taking up photography. NewWife(tm) had a cancer scare, started a small business, and stopped riding motorcycles. (Still ride each other, though.)

We lost everything in the Crash of 2008, declared bankruptcy in 2010, lived on dried beans and twigs for a while, and slowly clawed our way back to at least a modicum of the living standard we’d had before, although with scary little savings still. We managed to keep a roof over our heads the entire time, and if anything the shared struggle strengthened our marriage rather than rend it asunder, but it’s been tough. Draining, emotionally and physically. Not to mention time consuming.

I know in my last entry I was crying in my beer about not having any friends. But honestly, I wouldn’t have had time for them. I haven’t even been able to keep up with my virtual friends (so sorry, Raven!).

But now I do.

I was laid off last week.

The company has decided to downsize, and I take up a lot of space. So for the first time in 34 years, I can’t say “Radio Announcer” when someone asks what I do for a living.

Shit.

I’m scared. Out on the street with 34 years experience in a dying profession, and no other real skill. A severance package that will keep paying the mortgage on DangerHouse for some months, but after that…

I know what you’re saying: “Duh. Be a gigolo!

I appreciate that, and in another place and time you’re right, I would have made millions. But now, with OnlyFans and PornHub and Ashley Madison giving it away free, it’s a whole ‘nuther world. Doesn’t matter how good a cunnilinguist you are, with perfect scores across the board on Yelp and references available on request, well…

On the plus side I don’t have to get up at 3am, drive an hour to work, work an 8 hour shift, drive an hour back, cram whatever I can into my face and wife for 4 hours before doing show prep then passing out in bed so I can do it all over again tomorrow. So maybe I can start blogging a bit more. A lot depends on what new job I end up with, of course. Anyone know how much you can make on OnlyFans if you look like Jabba the Hutt with back hair…?

I do have quite a few stories to catch y’all up on, too: Janis Ian punched me, we got a COVID cat who loves me to the exclusion of everything else, including a very upset about it NewWifey(tm) (I actually did an entry about this just over a year ago, but it bears repeating), I became a taco, one of our neighbors thinks we called the cops on them about a loud party (we didn’t) and have been doing extraordinary things to extract their revenge, I won some photography awards, an angry lady mailed a dead mouse to NewWifey(tm), and I got a new 2-foot long penis. You gotta see this thing.

And hopefully you will. Soon.

Ciao!

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25 thoughts on “Radio GaGa

  1. I’m sorry to hear that your job disappeared but I have every confidence in you and your ability to spring back from this. You have a positive view on life and I know there will be other opportunities for you. Network the hell out of everyone you know and you’ll get hooked up with something. You WILL survive. Sending all the positive vibes your way that I can.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks babe, I might just do that. At the moment though, I’m still sitting here in the “too stunned to react to anything” phase. I’ll reach out to you if I feel the need to cry on a fellow ex-jock’s shoulder ๐Ÿ™‚

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      1. Absolutely understandable. I’ve got a couple of “right now’ suggestions for you – if you want to hear them. Otherwise I’ll gladly lend that shoulder.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Aw man, how happy I was to see you’d posted and now I’m a bit sad that you lost your job. But, hey, like her up there ^ said, you’ll get something, I’m sure. Cooking related? You’re a bit of a one in the kitchen. Glad to see you anyway. Hi to wifey x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Awww, thanks for that, Anna. Don’t be sad. It’s “chin up and carry on” over here, as I try to make the Lancaster City side of my family proud with my firm resolve. (The Italian side is recommending bloody vengence, but I’m not sure that’s the proper tack for this ship any more.) Great to see your name pop up in my comments. I’d assumed when I posted this that no one had me on their update list any more! x

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    1. Haha. It is to scoff. Couple of problems with that: it’s been a loooong time since I’ve stepped foot in a *professional* kitchen. Wouldn’t know what to do any more! And even if I did, a lot of restaurants around here are struggling just to stay open. Rising food prices are causing them to charge more, and that’s driving customers away. (My wife and I went out to lunch – LUNCH – last month, and a shared appetizer, 2 sandwiches, a soda, a beer, and a shared dessert cost us 70 bucks! And this was not Chez Snooty, either.) So I very well might end up working for an establishment that was only going to close two months later anyway!

      But…we’ll see. I am a god, after all. At least when it comes to fuckin’ cooking ๐Ÿ˜‰

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  3. DS, I’m truly sorry to hear about your job loss. I’ve heard you on the sound box a few times (almost neighbors but not really). Losing a job, or a career, before you’re ready sucks. Maybe a podcast or YouTube channel? All the cool kids are doing it.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I ve been trying to find what to say since I read it yesterday, after jumping up and down with joy because there was a new post from you…. I still don’t know what to say, it is all so unfair and depressing, but you ARE a fighter and I know you will come out of the dark clouds like a Superman! plus with all the improvements in elbows and other parts (cough, cough), you will be back in NO TIME!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. SALLY!! Lol – I just knew you’d be interested in my “other parts”, you hot Latina temptress! Aww, thanks for the kind words though, babe, they really meant a lot to me – including my elbows! ๐Ÿ™‚

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  5. I’m with the others, you have mad skillz, use them! Podcast? DJ? Personal chef? Photographer? A bit of everything? You’ll find your way. I do empathise though, speaking as somebody who hasn’t worked since pre-pandemic and now I’m facing age discrimination. I’m scraping by on Social Security. I hope you have applied for unemployment $$.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes! I’ll be personal chef who photographs his dishes and talks about them on his hit podcast – why didn’t I think of that?! Thanks, Julia!! And…I’m sorry to hear about the tough road you yourself are on. I hate hearing that. Misery does not always love company, and this is one of those times.

      As for Unemployment, I have a meeting scheduled with our Union lawyer for next week. We’ll be discussing the severance package the company sent me, and his recommendation(s) for things like that. Thank you for asking ๐Ÿ™‚

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  6. I listen to a radio show every morning (not to brag or anything…) out of DC and the host is semi-regularly bringing up the fact that their parent company has been doing mass layoffs in the past few years, and believe it or not, I thought about you every time it’s mentioned. You are/were (too soon??) the only radio-y person I sorta-kinda knew and would always hope that you wouldn’t be affected. Alas… I’m sure you’ll land on your feet somewhere, but in the mean time, try and enjoy your ‘break”–sounds like you need one.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Bex, that was very nice of you. Even your stupid humble-brag. (Lol, “radio-y”? “-y”??) And I certainly understand you thinking of me so often. You are a woman, after all.

      Oh man…I guess I really DO need a break. That was awful. Even for me.

      ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Like

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