It’s Magic

This is the greatest card trick I ever learned. Now it’s yours too.

You need an accomplice. One without Tourettes.

Let’s run through it:

Give a deck of cards to your mark. Let them shuffle it, light it on fire, eat it, whatever they want. When they’re done fucking around, have them pull whatever card they want out of the deck and show it to you and the audience (if you’re lucky enough to have an audience, let alone friends).

Now say to the mark, “I happen to know the GREATEST PSYCHIC IN THE WORLD: The Amazing Snowshoe! (or whatever) I’m going to call him/her up right now, and he/she will immediately tell you what card you chose.”

Take out your phone and call your accomplice.

When the accomplice pics up, you say “Hello! Is the Amazing Snowshoe there?”

Your accomplice answers, softly so no one else can hear if they’re standing near you, “Hearts…Clubs…Spades….Diamonds.

When you hear them say the suit of the card your mark picked, jump in with “Wonderful! Please ask him/her to come to the phone!” Your accomplice now knows what suit they have to say.

Your accomplice now starts running up the cards: “Ace…2…3…4….”

When he/she says the number of the mark’s card, jump in with “Great Snowshoe! Thank you so much for agreeing to do this! Please tell my lovely audience member what card they just chose from the pack.” Your accomplice now knows the face value of the card (the last number he said before you jumped in).

IMMEDIATELY hand the phone to the mark so The Great Snowshoe can amaze them beyond belief. Then collect your money. You did make this a bet, didn’t you?

It helps to run through this a few times so that your accomplice can get the pace right. Explain to him/her that they can’t go so fast that you interrupt them one card too late, or so slowly that your mark gets suspicious. It’s also a good idea, I’ve found, to have your accomplice write down the suit and number. A lot of accomplices are idiots, and will forget even in that short span.

Speaking of accomplices….

For now 19 years I’ve been carrying this picture in my wallet:

WalletWifey small-2

Happy Anniversary, baby!

It’s still magic.



15 thoughts on “It’s Magic

  1. Congrats and happy anniversary! Spoiler alert: There is no parade when you make it to your 20th. As I was sorely disappointed to find out. So I’m holding out for that statue you’re supposed to get on the 50th!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No parade? NO PARADE?! But…but…I already bought the tiara! Goddamit. Why even bother staying married to her, then? *sigh* Oh well. I look forward to making the pilgrimage to your statue someday. Just make sure it doesn’t get torn down by protesters before I get there.

      Liked by 1 person

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