My First WordPress

I am scared.  Poolie made me do it.  She said she will set it up for me.

scared man

I cannot believe she did this to me!



31 thoughts on “My First WordPress

    1. Ahhhhhhhhhh….no. But only because NewWifey(tm) threatened to relieve my shoulders the weight of my head should I even attempt to open an account there. I’ve already done nearly irreparable damage to her account by hacking into it once and accidentally spamming every one of her friends with a very personal note that I thought only she was gonna be able to see. I’m not re-opening that wound.


        1. Poolie – there’s something on one of the pages that opens up that says one of your comments is in “moderation”. What does that mean? It knows when you’re being immoderate?? Is this tied in to the e-mail account you set up that I can’t find? How will I know if I’m getting e-mail if that’s the case? And have I mentioned: “WHY AM I SO STUPID?” yet? none of this is making sense!


  1. Naturally you did. The red pill is your friend. And I’m happy to help. If you’ve got a paid account I can build you a custom theme. If you don’t have a paid account I’m not sure how much tweaking you can do to your theme anywho.


    1. Oh my GOD! You know what? Lol…I can barely bring myself to admit this, but I didn’t even know there was a new design up top! HAHAAAA! Since I can’t figure out how to bring up my home page from scratch, I just keep clicking the link that says “Comment” when I get an e-mail notification, and it brings me to the comments. Below the banner! NOW I KNOW WHAT YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT IN YOUR E-MAIL! Sheesh. I must have seemed like an ungrateful bastard (moreso than usual I mean) by not thanking you for it. Bwaaaahahahahaa! I am SUCH a schmuck. Or is it schlong? Anyway, thank you thank you thank you THANK YOU and yes yes yes yes YES! The theme is PERFECT!! (the all-caps mean I’m sincere.)

      I do have a couple of other questions that I’ll be pestering you with (like, uh, “what the hell do I do now” and “how can I get that picture of Poolie off my homepage” and “how can I stop this stupid thing from sending me e-mails every time someone comments?! Or at least send it to another address?? I’m drowning in notifications!”), but they’ll have to wait for tomorrow. Time for all morning drive announcers to get some sleep 🙂

      Thank you thank you thank you THANK YOU again!


  2. Heed the Pirates Call. Captain Poolie KNOWS you belong here on WordPress because all the Cool Kids hang here now. Resistance is futile!


      1. I was about to comment on your penis warning, but realized how pointless it would be.

        I tried to find an image that blended food and music and all the subliminal crap that goes with it. I can put something else together if you like but this header was the one that kind of jumped out and kicked me in the jaw and said, “Pick me! Pick me!” I can also take out the text saying “Rides Again” and just leave it saying “Dangerspouse” or whatever.


        1. No, no, that image is spot on perfect. Cooking! Music! Uh…words! I can’t believe how good you are! And leave the “Rides Again” in, I kinda like the continuity. And the innuendo. (That’s what you meant by “subliminal crap”, right?) THANKS KIDDO!!

          Liked by 1 person

      2. Not fer nuthin but I’ve read yer stuff at D’land and I’m not afeared of the stuff ya got. I’m a goat farmer and stinky boys and penises are normal in these parts….


  3. It’s amazing how many comments you have here and you haven’t even written a fucking thing. You are….amazing. And goatbarnwitch is right. All the cool kids hang here. So just write something, okay?


    1. HOW?! I’ve already tried adding a tag line and some profile stuff, but none of it took. When I click on any of the icons I get taken to all sorts of pages, and never can get back to my front page. I gotta do some FAQ research or something and figure out how to post. My brain hurts.


        1. No! No! I’m determined to do this, no matter HOW much little girl sobbing and bitching I have to do! I think now, thanks to you and L, I can figure out at least how to post something. I think. Except that now I can’t figure out how to get back any of the tabs that let me do things. All I see is my diary here, with no option to do anything other than read or comment. Where did all the tabs go??

          Also, back when I *was* able to find them a few days ago, I clicked on some settings tab and changed my by-line from the one you initially gave me “I’m not as scary as it sounds” to “The sound of a switchblade and a motor bike” (old Elton John lyric). In that tab it says the change was made, but nothing shows up on my homepage.

          You know what I think I’m gonna do? In all seriousness, I think I’m gonna post my entries as new comments here instead of separate posts. It’ll just be much easier, and funnier! Who else does that, huh? I’m a pioneer! Wheeeeeeee!


            1. Oh right, the pictures!! I forgot to go back to them after I left work. D’oh! My wife is right about me….

              Anyway, off I go to check them out. I’ll get this sooner or later (hopefully before you run out of patience, lol).

              One thing though: I stil cannot seem to get to a page that allows me to actually do anything. All I see is this front “Dangerspouse” page and the comments. There are no more tabs or anything else to click that will bring me to anything else, like adding an entry or tweaking my preferences. Did I crash my site already??


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